I am working on capstone currently. I have a little less than 2 weeks left to complete my project. I also feel like crap about this whole project. I have learned a lot about windows. I have learned the API for accessing the OS stuff sucks and it is a big pain. I have also learned that SQLite is a pain to get to work with Entity Framework. So much so that I have just ended up writing my own SQLite queries and said screw EF. Since I am working on trying to get this program to work with Windows XP. I have been running into compatibility issues all across the board. It never ends. I find that it blows up either in the service that talks to the OS or in the database manager or even in the graphic interface.

When you hit a challenge like this and you have the motivation, it can still take hours to resolve. I honestly feel like I set myself up to stand out in a firing range and the people shooting aren't letting up. It is frustrating for me because I don't have the enough technical knowledge to fully understand what I am implementing. I want to know but to learn the amount of technologies that I am trying to use would be impossible. Well, impossible in the amount of time that I have for capstone. So, without that knowledge and or experience; it makes things a bit difficult. I have been trying to understand Events since I have gotten to this school. I understand what they are for and why they are useful. As for trying to follow how they work, it stumps me. I can't grasp it for some reason. This leads me to believe that I am meant to be a web dev guy. I love Ruby on Rails. I love the layout of MVC with web applications. Ever since I can remember I have been one that loves art design. So layouts for websites and stuff like that intrigue me; I can do it for hours.

As for business logic applications, the one I am working on with my capstone, I don't know what questions to ask in order to get it finished. I completely understand that I am not supposed to be going and getting help from people. But at the same time, I still don't have a damn clue on what I do at this point. I go into the Capstone teacher and he tells me to break down the problem. That is all I have been doing this entire project. I wouldn't be nearly as far as I am if I didn't break the problems down. I have overcome some pretty challenging problems. At my skill level, I actually didn't think I was able to do half the things I have done. As for the concept of design, I don't know how to implement what I am wanting to do. I don't know what to Google or where to go or what questions to ask.

The more I work on this project the less I want to ever do something like this ever again. I really wish I picked a project that I originally wanted to do. I am not sure if it would have been accepted but at least it would have been a whole lot more interesting than this wall of problems. Sure I have learned a lot. More than anything I have learned I need to learn a hell a lot more to know what to do on this project. I would claim this project as a burn out project. It really has burned my optimism on coding, and my motivation on even getting through this. I haven't really made progress in over 2 weeks and I am more fiddling with how my code is laid out rather than knowing what to do to proceed.

It is especially frustrating when I am spending almost 40 hours of tracked time on this project a week and I get very little done. Even more so over the past two weeks. Like I want to complete this project. I want to show that I understand what I am doing. I want to impress my peers. But I am going to have other people with simple and stupid projects - that somehow got their project approved - completed and I will have crap to show for the amount of hours I have put into this project. It ticks me off so much because I have been one that when I take something serious I dig in hard and commit. On this project, I have been putting forth a serious effort into completing this project. Yet there are others that have passed this class by putting in "maybe" an hour a day if that...